A Little Christmas Rant
Although I'm once again pleasantly surprised at how quickly Christmas has come around, the thoughts and emotions evoked by several other things that are common in the Christmas seasons I experience are a bit mixed.
Does Christmas Suck?
Christmas-themed trash. Unbearable and incessant ads for said trash. "Sales" for said trash whose prices were increased the month prior to mislead eager consumers into thinking they're saving. Buy more. Buy now. Consume more. Emotionless gifts given only out of obligation so you don't look like a cheap asshole. Gift cards your coworkers can use to purchase more slop, or even worse, a Tim Horton's pizza.1 That shitty knockoff smartwatch made and delivered thanks to the exploitation and abuse of hundreds of impoverished children and Amazon employees is on it's way to the landfill alright, it's just taking a 3 year detour by way of the bottom drawer of Aunt Sharron's desk.
The anxiety and uncertainty of whether your gifts will really be appreciated by the recipient or just tolerated, or might unintentionally upset them. Wondering if the gifts you receive have strings attached or be cited when the giver accuses you of being ungrateful or spoiled. If you suffer(ed) from narcissistic or abusive parents, relatives, or partners, this may be familiar.
Christmas music. So much fucking Christmas music.
Get-togethers and parties with people you don't know, or with that one loud and super racist/queerphobic alcoholic relative that no one feels comfortable uninviting. The place is a mess. You'll clean it later when you don't feel exhausted anymore.
No. And It Doesn't Have To.
I think so much of what can make holidays like Christmas stressful or unenjoyable is due to the societal and capitalist pressures that a "great and joyful Christmas" means you need to buy the biggest and greatest gifts you can or have extravagant parties. It doesn't need to be any of that at all.
Sleep in. Don't bother with changing into your clothes. Hug your pet and give them extra treats or human food. Take a little walk, freeze your ass off, and come back home for a nice hot shower. Spend time with your partner, friends, relatives, or just relax by yourself with some music and weed. Try cooking up an awesome and unique dinner, or stick with the classic safe food you won't get tired of until the end of time. Dig out and watch through some of those old movie DVDs. You have a chance to finally finish that video game or puzzle or art project.
I don't want to treat Christmas and other holidays as something that must be extravagant or busy or expensive to be worth appreciating. I don't need gift cards I'll never spend, random junk I'll forget about or throw away in 2 years, a big party, or to fill my house with a comically absurd amount of decorations. There's nothing wrong with just keeping it simple, and enjoying the simple things that you otherwise struggle to find time for.
If Christmas is spiritually or religiously significant to you, I think that's all the more reason to be mindful about these kinds of things so that the occasion feels meaningful and fulfilling.
Let's stop wasting time and money buying garbage for each other. Let the holidays be a time for some good old relaxation and care for each other and ourselves.
And fuck capitalism for perverting and corrupting everything it touches. Jesus is probably considering coming back down to throw hands.
Join The War On Christmas!
As a certified queer satan-worshipping member of the Communist-Socialist System of Islam, it is my sacred honour and duty to eradicate the word "Christmas" from all of language as part of the war on Christmas, and I think we should keep making fun of the reactionary morons who get outraged by it and think it's real mwahahaha! Hbomberguy's video is worth checking out if you want to laugh at some right wing morons fuming over underpaid teenagers at Walmart saying "happy holidays" instead of "merry Christmas", and it has some nice discussion about what it means to celebrate it.
Footnotes
I haven't actually tried the Tim Horton's attempt at pizza, but if their decision to move away from the omelette egg patties to the cracked eggs resulting in an awful and inconsistent texture is anything to go off of, I don't think I'm missing out on much.↩